Why is it so hard to accept ourselves and others ?
Often we are comparing ourselves and others to the 'perfect person' but who is the perfect person? Do they even exist in real life? We often have an image in our mind what a 'perfect person' would do in each situation and then we apply that to ourselves and others and look at that to be the acceptable outcome or behaviour in a situation. No surprise we feel pressure not to speak up or not show up ( including emotionally), become reactive or defensive, who can be perfect all the time! It is exhausting trying to 'be' someone other than yourself. Having expectations of others, what we expect them to do and not do, how they 'should' know what we want, that is a lot of pressure on both and often leads to lack of harmony in any relationship, including the relationship with ourselves when we don't honour what is for our highest good. Why do we do it? As when we think about what really connects us it's the 'not so perfect parts' the vulnerability, courage to show up, even when things are not going well, the love, the honesty, even when there could be a lot to loose, but doing it anyway.
Being honest with ourselves
Being honest with ourselves and others is what allows us to be ourselves and is very liberating, it allows the story that needs to be told, to be told, to have a space to be released and then left in the past, so that it no longer controls how we live into the future. I noticed this the other day, there was something I had not mentioned to my husband that happened before we were married, I didn't think of it very often but when I did, it didn't seem the right time to mention it or I thought I would tell him later and that time never came, so there was always this part of me that I had kept from him and would drag the past along to the present at these times. One day it came to mind and finally, I shared my story with him, there was no comment, he just listened. Since that day I have felt a new level of freedom, I didn't realise by holding on to it all this time, even though I felt it was small how much of a weight was lifted. The timing was right for me now as I have grown to love and accept myself more over the years, though the many Kinesiology sessions I've had and through meditation as well. Being free, to be yourself, is what everyone wants. It takes courage, honesty, compassion and kindness as well as letting go of expectations to get there. Being in a space to be able to accept ourselves and others 'even though' we are not perfect and we make 'mistakes'. It is in the quiet time we give to ourselves such as meditation, writing a journal, Kinesiology, to be able to reflect, learn and grow that we find the kindness and compassion to be enough 'even though' we may not get it all 'right'. The more we connect to ourselves and hear and understand what our heart is guiding us to, the more we will be ok with all that is going on in and around us, seeing a different kind of perfect, Allowing for assuming to be removed and all the stress that goes along with it. It can be difficult to move towards love and acceptance without support as there may be anger, hurt and pain as well as feelings of being stuck in this 'place'. I am here to support you on that journey if you feel the time has come for you to love and accept yourself 'even though' you may still need to heal from your hurt.
With Love & Gratitude
Sonja Leon
Inner Purpose
Awaken your Inner Happiness, Be the Light for yourself & others
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