'It's Time To Stop Saying Sorry For Being YOU'
All too often when woman cross paths with another person or they need to move into another space, walk into a room, need someone else’s time and attention, literally anything that takes up space you will often hear a woman say ‘Sorry (to bother you), I just need to ________’ whatever it is. If people are waiting for them again the opening statement will be along the lines of ‘Sorry, I’m late’ or ‘excuse me for ____________’.
What is being said (subconsciously) is asking for someone else’s permission to accept their behaviour or to virtually excuse themselves for taking up space.
I usually don’t compare men and woman, as we are not the same and we don’t need to be men to be a fulfilled woman, however have you noticed if a male does the same actions, they rarely say sorry, and it is acceptable for them which highlights we can all take up space and be ourselves in space, not because men do but because we all can....
It is old conditioning for females, that we need to become consciously aware of and change our language, we are not an exception nor do we need permission from someone else to take up space.
For woman this language reinforces all too often being less than someone else and contributes to those feeling of ‘I am not enough’ and the lack of self-worth that many women experience.
Say 'Thank-You' Rather Than 'Sorry'
There are many ways the conversation or statement can change and be empowering, an acknowledgement rather than expressing ourselves as if we are wrong, invalid or less than:
‘Thanks for waiting for me’, rather than ‘Sorry I’m late’
‘Do you have a few minutes, I need to talk to you about ….?’ rather than ‘Sorry to bother you….’
‘I need to get xyz, I’m just going to move past you…. Thank you’, rather than ‘Sorry, I just need to squeeze past, I just need to get xyz’.
What we think and say reinforces who we are and what we are willing to accept for ourselves and teaches others what we will accept also. It will take quite a conscious effort to change this ingrained language and use empowering language as above, but it is possible and can have a big impact.
Maybe you would like to challenge yourself, just for today and become consciously aware how many times you say ‘sorry’ or ‘excuse me.’ Perhaps, take it a step further and try catch yourself before saying them, change your language and feel the difference in yourself, it may feel uncomfortable, but there is also a feeling of you owning the situation, empowered, stating your arrival as opposed to just trying to fit in or be invisible.
I’d love to hear how you go and if you decide to take the challenge on for longer than a day or what you noticed in that day, how you felt, how others responded, how did you change your language.
If this is something that you find difficult or you feel you need support with, your self-worth, to feel seen, heard, validated and acknowledged, I can support you with this. Please contact me, Sonja on 0407558216 or sonja@innerpurpose.com.au
Please get in contact if this is something you would like to honour in yourself, for yourself. I love to share in the transformation of woman re-connect with self-worth, their inner glow, as when we feel included and accepted by ourselves, it is true inner beauty.
Until next time we connect
Big Love and Hugs
Sonja xo
With Love & Gratitude Sonja Leon Inner Purpose
Awaken your Inner Happiness, Be the Light for yourself & others
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